ILLUMINATION

I watched a movie this evening entitled "Everything is Illuminated". It was devastatingly sad, yet truly illuminating. It was so heart breaking that I cannot sleep. I often wonder why there is so much hatred in the world. Where does it come from? Why does it persist? I don't understand what someone gains by massacring others. Have we become so soul-less, so complacent, that we just don't care anymore? I am deeply devastated by so many things going on in the world today...and what has transpired in the past. I feel so hopeless, not knowing what I can do to make a difference. What can I do to make a change in a world so disrupted, so off kilter, so off course?

I have been reading "Notes From My Travels" from Angelina Jolie off and on for the past several months. It is not a book you can read all at once; yet it is not one you can read in short little bursts. It is crushing to read what occurs in the world around us. We, in America, live in our protective bubble. We are protected from the atrocities taking place all over the world. Unfortunately, we are the cause of many of those atrocities. We suffer from the worst case of exceptionalism; believing that we are special or for some unknown reason better than everyone else in the world. There are those who believe that we should offer no assistance to anyone outside of our country; that those people should fend for themselves. I am disgusted when I hear that. How can your heart not break when you hear of little children having their hands cut off? What the hell is wrong with Americans? I hear ridicule and criticism of Angelina Jolie and Oprah Winfrey because they are offering assistance to other countries. God forbid someone should give a damn about something outside of the United States borders! I am disgusted that such horrific things are going on in this world and our pompous, rich, and spoiled asses are just standing by and watching it go on. What is even more pathetic is that when someone does attempt to help they get ridiculed. What the hell? We are not just "American", we are HUMAN!

I can see that I have a long road ahead of me. I have so much yet to accomplish in my life. I am tired of watching people suffer, I am tired of all of the devastation and destruction. I lived for so long wrapped up in myself thinking that the world revolved around me. I know better now. If I can make the smallest change to create less suffering for those that follow me, that is what I will do. I have come to appreciate the fact that I am alive rather than being so depressed about it. I have come to appreciate that I can breathe, I can eat, I can hug and love my children. I have come to appreciate how much I have been given, how much I have, and how blessed I am. I have come to appreciate this world that I live in and how truly miraculous it is that I live in the United States. For everything that is wrong with the United States, for everything that makes me angry about our systems and our government, we are some of the luckiest individuals in the world. I may be what they define as "poor", but I have a rich mind and a rich life and I will never again forget it. I am thankful every day that I have another day and that I have been blessed with so many opportunities, so many road blocks, so much guidance, so many angels. I hope you will take a moment and think about what you are thankful for. What have you been blessed with? What life are you living that others could only dream of? How illuminated are you?